We are not taught to be grateful. Forget about good things.
We are not taught to be grateful to people who really played a crucial role in our lives. It often happens that a pastor corrects a man, and the person becomes afraid that he is no longer a normal person, at that very moment he feels people don’t love him anymore and he begins to hide.
Example: The Soviet generation has been raised to be grateful and indebted for everything not to their parents, but to the country, motherland, party or the party leader. A common phrase is “Thank you, Comrade Stalin for our happy childhood.”
In a family, if a father corrects, educates and makes comments, the child is afraid that he is not normal anymore, he begins to think that parents stopped loving him. This is a result of misunderstanding both the correction and motives of the father’s heart. Unfortunately people tend think in this way after receiving correction and they change dramatically. Our society is filled with this.
An example from the Soviet Union. A simple denunciation could lead to an execution of firing squad, no matter how great the contribution of this person to the development of the country. One neighbor’s denunciation (often false) – and without trial people could be killed.
People did not have a chance to justify themselves. They did not have a chance to correct themselves after the deeds they committed. This is real murder; it’s the spiritual and moral destruction of man.
A man places a label on everyone who has ever let him down, they do not give people the right or chance to make a mistake. But you must remember any circumstance can occur, and that even you yourself are not perfect. Because of this mentality so many problems exist in the family. We must give people a chance – people can simply make a mistake.
1 Corinthians 4:5 “Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God.”
Why judge on single occasion?
This was also used for career growth – used to drown the another person and raise yourself up.
Example: A man lived and had a good reputation among his neighbors, but on one occasion he had an incident with the police and all of the neighbors immediately turned away from him.
Example: The good doctors who saved many lives, conduct one unsuccessful operation. That doctor immediately becomes the victim of persecutions, rumors, they are labeled and branded for their deed. Everyone quickly forgets how many lives they saved, no one gave any room for an error.
Presumption of innocence (Latin praesumptio innocentiae) – is one of the fundamental principles of the criminal justice system, it is considered the highest achievement of democracy in the field of law. The basic principle of the presumption of innocence states: “A person is innocent until proven otherwise.”
In most civilized countries presumption of innocence includes following:
1. A person is considered innocent until his guilt is proved
Anyone (even openly and formally charged with any crime or other investigative agencies of the state, even arrested in connection with these charges) is considered innocent until proved guilty of committing a crime is proved in a lawful manner (according to the laws of this country) and until this proof will not be confirmed (installed) to the relevant judicial decision (judgment), the Court , which came into force (by the laws of this country).
2. A person does not have to prove his innocence
Any citizen (the suspect, the accused) has the right (which it may or may not use at will) give evidence, but he does not have to prove his innocence.
The accused is entitled to give any testimony. The accused has the right to completely refuse to testify (self-explanatory), even the right to refuse to answer certain questions. The fact of the total absence of the defendant’s evidence of innocence itself is not considered to be proof of his guilt. The denial of the accused on the evidence and from some explanations, the fact of giving them contradictory and even false statements are not grounds for conviction.
3. The burden of proving guilt rests on the prosecution
If charged with committing a criminal offense (i.e. given the status of a citizen of the accused), the burden of proof of these allegations, “that is, the obligation to identify, collect and provide to the court the evidence of guilt of the accused is on the” side of the prosecution. “
Mistakes (failures) – the main driving force behind the success
The right to fail (failures) means the right to innovation, research, venturing, experimentation, discovery and success in new directions, where “still untouched by human hands.” The more mistakes you make, the more success you achieve.
“In order to quickly achieve success, it is necessary to double the number of failures” (Thomas Watson).
Life – is a process of trial and errors
You learn when you move to action when making a mistake, studying the feedback, learn lessons, and move forward. In the words of Alfred Sloan, who made General Motors one of the most successful, profitable and large industrial companies in the world: “Life itself – a process of trial and errors. And those people who make no mistakes are those who make nothing.”
In any case, the person has the right to be wrong – he’s a man!
The realities of the post-Soviet landscape
In our society, if a man speaks out and says something is not right, they become unpopular, the enemy spreads it and tries to humiliate, people can spit in their face in the truest sense of the word. “Fly in the ointment spoils the barrel of honey.”
Example: In a university institute if a person did not like the guidance counselor and as a result the attitude within the institute became poor afterwards. Then the university dean liked him – and everybody immediately “began to respect him” in the institute.
People respect you, you are doing a lot of good for them, but as soon as you refuse to cover their lies or tell the truth, they immediately turn away, you immediately become bad in their perspective. In our society if you’re not used to studying, the chances of getting degree is not good, even if you receive a doctoral, you’re considered to be a bad student.
Example: The leader raised a rehabilitated person and put life into them, then the leader fell. The rehabilitated person becomes the leader. When the former leader comes back, and the raised leader – his former rehabilitation mentee – refuses to accept him, because he is so bad.
How do we perceive people who are not like us?
IN THE COUNTRY OF BROKEBACK HARMONY IS PERCEIVED AS UGLINESS
That is why, all the people consider pastor as an eccentric, alien or a man from another world.
Everything changed. We perceive good as anything that creates comfort and correction is perceived as evil, because it is uncomfortable.
Example: In rehab centers mentors gives their life for rehabilitated people, and then, as soon as they begin to bring correction people leave rehab center and criticize their leader.
If you do not remember the good, you will eventually end up where you started from.
When someone makes a mistake, it does not eliminate all their positive qualities, and everything that they have done and can do for us did not disappear. However, we often start blaming them, and so we cut off a source of goodness in our life. By doing so we end up where we started from.
Romans 11:16-20 “If the dough offered as firstfruits is holy, so is the whole lump, and if the root is holy, so are the branches. 17 But if some of the branches were broken off, and you, although a wild olive shoot, were grafted in among the others and now share in the nourishing root of the olive tree, 18 do not be arrogant toward the branches. If you are, remember it is not you who support the root, but the root that supports you. 19 Then you will say, “Branches were broken off so that I might be grafted in.” 20 That is true. They were broken off because of their unbelief, but you stand fast through faith. So do not become proud, but fear.”
Example: TV SHOW “Let them talk.” When Pastor R. Trokhin talked about God and Pastor Sunday and the church how both of them together freed him from drugs, still people missed the good and focused on believing it was a “cult.”
Wrong response to correction
If we are corrected, we start to think bad about the man that brought the correction – this repels us and does not promote a close relationship. When we do not see the good, we think only about ourselves, selfishness blinds us, we regard ourselves only. We do not think about the fact that this man actually wanted to help us.
Even in the church we live with labels. When the pastor corrects us, we are confident that he has already placed a label on us, this downgrades our self-esteem.
1 Corinthians 4:3-4 “But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged by you or by any human court. In fact, I do not even judge myself. 4For I am not aware of anything against myself, but I am not thereby acquitted. It is the Lord who judges me.”
You must be able to forgive, and do not hold a grudge
If we can break ourselves, work on ourselves, you will have good a personality or character. Do not live without values, but instead live with values as the foundations of society and your emotions, do not have a bad character. You must treat others in the way we would like them to treat us.
When we make mistakes, we are looking for mercy, and when the others are wrong, we are looking for justice.
“HOW DO YOU JUDGE OTHERS – YOU ARE JUDGES, AS A SELF – ATTORNEYS ‘.
James 2:13 “For judgment is without mercy to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment.”
Romans 14:9-14 “For to this end Christ died and lived again, that he might be Lord both of the dead and of the living. 10 Why do you pass judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you despise your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God; 11 for it is written, “As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God.” 12 So then each of us will give an account of himself to God. 13 Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother. 14 I know and am persuaded in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself, but it is unclean for anyone who thinks it unclean.”
Trying to please with affairs
We all have the honor complex: If doing the right thing – I’m good, if I do wrong – bad. It’s against the New Testament, because we are not saved by works of the law, Romans 3:20 “For by works of the law no human being will be justified in his sight, since through the law comes knowledge of sin.”
Nobody has to do anything for us
Often the perception of good is dependent on the person. For example people say “It has to be in this particular manner.” But if a person has done something good to me, then I have to remember it for all of my life. If I do not remember the good, then I will not be able to fully do good, I will expect ingratitude from people. It’s time to stop expecting good from someone else, it is necessary to become a giver of good by yourself, become the one who sows the good.
We do not have a picture of the whole, but see parts of it
For human beings the act is more important than the person, their essence or their personality. We do not have the authority of the truth, there is the authority of the person. We must become the change agents in the country, to bring new values.
Questions for homework:
1. What should be the right attitude towards receiving discipline or correction? What was your previous attitude to these things?
2. Why do we have to thank the people who have corrected us, and even punished us?
3. Prove why punishment, correction and remarks are not a negative thing.
4. What is the presumption of innocence? How can I give the benefit of the doubt to others? Or rather I do not show it.
5. What is the right to be wrong? Analyze yourself. How often do I give others the right to make errors or not?
6. Prove that mistakes, failures, falling – are a major driving force for success.
7. How do we perceive the people who are not like us? How do we perceive people when it is not convenient for us? What should be the correct perception of these people?
8. What is my reaction to the patch today? What should it be?
9. Romans 14:9-14. What’s the principle of the presumption of innocence?
10. If I do things right – I am a good person, if I do something wrong – I am bad. What is the delusion of such a mentality?
From Leadership School #7
October 9, 2013 in Kiev
Press center of the church “Embassy of God”
Translated by Rodion Kuznetsov
Edited by Sharin Collins